A few weeks ago, BE, BC, and I went out for ice cream. BE’s school had designated a specific day when a percentage of sales from this ice cream shop would be donated to the PTA. There were a lot of other families there, including some of BE’s friends. One friend was in line behind us when BE told me that she had never been to this shop before. In fact, she had been there two summers ago – the first summer that she lived with us. So, I reminded her of this. Her friend overheard me say, “when you first came to live with us.” This friend then turned to BE and said “Are you adopted?” BE said, “yes” and I could tell that the friend’s parents were embarrassed. So I told them not to worry about it.
As I was saying “when you first came to live with us,” I wondered if I should. I don’t want to be broadcasting BE’s story to everyone within earshot, but I also don’t want to purposely avoid the topic – I definitely don’t want to communicate that there’s something shameful about it.
When BE gets older, I hope that she’ll be able to tell me how she feels about this. If I know her preference, maybe I can just do whatever makes her feel most comfortable.