I get scared when you yell

Adoption

One thing I really like about BCLC is that much of it is about improving yourself as opposed to always trying to change your kids.

Another aspect that I’ve come to accept as true for me, is that there are really only two primary emotions – love and fear. So when I get angry because the kids are yelling, it is really fear that is being triggered.

I’ve been working on combining these two concepts, by identifying when I feel afraid/nervous and then trying to do better the next time. I’m also really conscious about being a good example for the kids. So, recently I completely over-reacted when the kids were fighting. After I calmed down, I talked to BE and confessed, “I get scared when you yell,” and I apologized for losing my temper. And, of course we talked about the importance of using our inside voices. don’t know if it meant anything to her, but I’ll keep working on it.